Welcome to Vivster!

you know that he does nothing good for you recently,
but to make you cry.
you know that it hurts so much for loving him,
even if love itself can be defined as ‘beautiful’.
but it don’t matter.
i don’t wanna count how many times he makes you cry,
that just makes me sick.
i want you to get the best for you,
as i know you’d do your best for the world.
i don’t wanna tell you what to do,
but i’d tell you what not to do:
it is NOT destroying yourself with his pathetic little thing he called ‘love’.
whatever.
so i’m asking you now,
is it gonna be the last time he makes you cry?
or won’t it be easier if you just let him fly?

yea,yea. ‘fly’ could be defined as ‘good-bye’
but then again, i’m not gonna tell you what to do.
but if you ask my opinion, well that’s about it.
just…
for any decisions you’re gonna make,
think clearly.
you don’t wanna regret anything in the end.

i’m saying this as a good friend who cares about you.

(ps: you know you deserve better)

akhir-akhir ini losing interest to friendster. kalo online bawaannya buka blog, blogwalking, bikin flipbook, anything but friendster! soalnya lebih menyenangkan blogwalking, baca2 blog orang yg gak gw kenal, siapa tau terinspirasi. kalo diinget-inget, jaman gw lagi gila-gilanya friendster, adaa aja masalah yg nyangkut. dari mulai si mantan, mantannya pacar, seseorang, mantannya seseorang, seorang cewe yang gw anti banget. ggrrrr.. friendster membuat dunia semakin sempit. ada percakapan antara gw dan laras yg gw inget:

Gw: Fs tuh norak tau ras. Noraknya kenapa? Masa ada orang berantem di Friendster. ada orang nyepet-nyepet orang di Friendster. Gak banget kan?

Laras: Iya, bener banget. Gw nih, buktinya. Dibilang munafik lagh, apa lah. Hhh. Terserah deh.

Gw: Iya, ras! Friendster tu emang bisa nyari temen, tapi bisa punya musuh juga. Bisa buat nyelidikin orang-orang. Hahaha!!

… Yaa, kurang lebih begitu. Itulah makanya gw lebih suka blogwalking sekarang. mengingat di dunia blog hanya beberapa orang yang bener2 gw kenal banget, membaca kisah hidup mereka (yg nyaris ngga berhubungan sama gw) jadi kayak baca novel aja. gak perlu ada pandangan subjektif sebagai orang yg kenal mereka. haha.

and you know what? my life is less painful now. and i’m enjoying being alone. other people just get in my face, i need some space.

anyway. udah denger soundtrack Spiderman 3 yang dibawain Snow Patrol? judulnya Signal Fire. lagunya bagus, video klipnya cute bgt, dan liriknya? njiss… gw bgt:

The perfect words never crossed my mind,
Cuz there was nothin’ in there but you.
I felt every ounce of me screaming out,
But the sound was trapped deep in me.
All I wanted just sped right past me,
While I was rooted fast to the earth,
I could be stuck here for a thousand years,
Without your arms to drag me out.

[Chorus:]
There you are standing right in front of me
There you are standing right in front of me
All this fear falls away to leave me naked,
Hold me close, cuz I need you to guide me to safety.

No, I don’t want to wait forever [x2]

In the confusion and the aftermath,
You are my signal fire.
The only resolution and the only joy,
Is the faint spark of forgiveness in your eyes.

[Chorus (x2)]

No, I don’t want to wait forever [x3]

watdefak? hahaha..

ampun laahhhh…!!!

U think U know Vienz? Think again.

1. When I was a little girl, I used to dream about being ‘Puteri Indonesia’. Cuz even then, I thought the questions were so easy and I could’ve done better. BUT since I stopped growing at 152 cm tall, I also stopped dreaming. I aim to be a host for Discovery Travel and Living or National Geographic ever since.
2. My confidence is my biggest strength. But over-confidence kills. I get in a lot of trouble by it.
3. I hate it when I have to listen to that ‘calling tone’ on the phone line after about 10 seconds and the person I’m calling is not picking up the phone. GOSH, what’s so hard about picking up a phone call, dammit!!! (I think that’s even worse than un-replied text messages)
4. My first dream-job was a ‘TEACHER’. Then I  changed into an ‘ARCHEOLOGIST’. It was about on 5th grade that I started wanting to be an ‘ARCHITECT’. I never wanted to be a doctor like many kids in my age want to be when they grow up.
5. I’m a big flirt. No, no, it’s not my over-confidence. Sometimes, I don’t mean to flirt, but people often mis-understand me. I joke a lot, I fool around, but I never mean to flirt, or whatever. Still I find it fun to do it though.. Hehe. I think it is not my physical appearance (I mean, come on!), but it’s totally because I’m just fun to be with. My personality is ok, I think. (pede)
6. I COULD BE A VERY MEAN GIRL IF I WANTED TO. On 10th grade, I wrote down a cell-phone number of a girl who tried to steal my (ex)boyfriend, everywhere (like, on a classroom table, cafeteria table, bathroom walls, pretty much everywhere). I wrote: "CALL ME! 081755566xx" or "HI, I’M LONELY… 081755566xx". Hahaha. My friends say that’s very mean… Relax, I don’t do it anymore now. Except if you try to start a war. Haha!!
7. I’m a psycho. I have this paranoia stuff all the time. Like, how if I got on a plane, and then the plane crashed down and then I’d never see my beloved ones….? or how if another girl is hitting on my boyfriend at this moment (skanky b1tch!)? but that’s just about it. I never put my paranoia thoughts as the base of my arguments.
8. Yet on the other hand, I have this strong intuition towards other people. If something is wrong in my relationship, I can feel it. If my friend is having a bad day, I sense it. If I have a first impression on someone, it’s usually right. I don’t know, I read too many popular psychology books, I guess. And somehow, people keep doing the same mistakes like what they write in the books, so I can read the pattern. I listen to other people’s problems, I try to give advice. May be I should be a psychoanalyst instead of an architect? Hmm…
9. Ironically, I usually don’t notice even if my best friend just had a haircut or changed his/her glasses. That kind of detail just slips on me. Weirrd.
10. I have some symptoms of insomnia. Have had it since I was on elementary school. At what time do most kids go to bed? 8?9? Well, I went to bed at 10 or 11 as a kid. And the habit continues, and gets worse in Architecture… now I only have some 2 or 3 hours of sleep everyday. Haha. Now I’m regretting the fact that I didn’t have enough sleep as a child.
11. My guilty pleasure kind of music: RnB. Haha. Forget The Doors, forget Beatles, forget jazz, indie pop, and rock n roll. ‘Officially Missing You’ made me cry. Hahahaa,,,
12. Don’t forget the fact that I like ADA Band’s songs. Hiihiihii
13. Sometimes I think I’ve got some mental disorder.. (see number 7)
14. I spend many many hours thinking why do girls fall for bad guys who obviously don’t deserve them at all? Yet, we still fall for bad guys, BIG TIME.
15. I believe in KARMA. You get what you give, babe!
16. I know almost any dance from Spice Girls era to Britney and Christina, and the latest: Avril Lavigne’s "Girlfriend". Haahaahaa!
17. I’ve watched every single Batman movies. I think ‘Batman Returns’ is the best, but George Clooney is the hottest Batman ever.
18. I have over-exaggerated imaginations. They just go wild and get out of control sometimes. Told you I was a day-dreamer.
19. I don’t care if you call me fat. I mean, I’m sad of course, but that won’t encourage me to go on some stupid diet or become an anorexic. No, no. I love to eat!!! That’s important.
20. What’s my dream project as an architect? It’s to design a Formula 1 Circuit in Indonesia. Mainly because I’m a huge fan of F1, secondly because I don’t like the fact that we lost to Malaysia on this. Haha. I love the smell of competition, guys..

Haha. Now think again, may be you only see me from the outside. There’s more in me than you’ll ever see, mate!

Wet Ground by Sondre Lerche

Wet ground and the snow is still not falling

Circumstances are alarming, darling

The future is just a word, that’s how I recall it

The past is much more present in our yawning

But I heard you right

Something was lost from the start

Oh babe, what should we do, what should we say?

Should we give it away?

The future looked so bright then

What happened tonight?

Now aeroplanes are crashing

Who turned out the light?

Seemingly it seems to me I’m subject to a joke

And it’s not a test

Wet ground and the stars are still out shining

Neon lights were never oh, so blinding

Prosecute the ones who stand accused

Let the others go or leave them dying

But I heard you right

Everything was here before

We shouldn’t add or put away a thing

Let nobody win

The future looked so bright then

What happened tonight?

Now aeroplanes are crashing

Who turned out the light?

Seemingly it seems to me I’m subject of a joke

And it’s not a sin

( http://principessalavienz.blogspot.com )